Cyber-Suck, Or How I Learn to Stand on One Foot

Dear Fellow Blogophiles,

Let me describe for you my past week (which, oddly enough, I also happen to be learning to do in my Macedonian class this week, but that's completely unrelated).  I wake up early, some mornings do yoga, have my tea and cereal (or muffins one morning :) and spend about an hour on Blogger since so many people post or schedule their posts GMT 4:00-13:00 (–5).  In this time, I never get through everything I want to read, and leave at least a dozen posts open in tabs in my Firefox window.

After the morning routine (се туширам, мијам забите...) I head to class.  Including travel time, this takes about 5:30 hours—all in all not bad, considering some people have real 9-5 jobs, so I'm not complaining.  Frequently on our breaks I will even hop on the computer, check my email, and even log into Blogger to respond to someone who's commented on a post—that's how excited I am when you guys comment.  Yes, I'm a dork, but a friendly dork :)

After I come home, I get on Blogger and try catching up again or writing my own post.  I frequently discover that hours have passed and I still have 2 dozen tabs open that I want to read.  But, obviously, I have to stop, do my homework (домашна работа), make dinner (правам вечера), clean up (мијам садови), and then spend time with my husband who I haven't seen all day.  After a while, I'm exhausted, so I move upstairs and read until I pass out.

Do you notice what's missing here?  Do you see the obvious problem?

As if this weren't bad enough, I've now thrown Twitter into the mix.  Btw, folks, I don't get it.  I understand the potential.  Tweet about your new books, others ReTweet, and thousands more than otherwise will buy the book.  And that's awesome.  I haven't seen any of that yet, and instead have seen a lot of people talking about their flights being delayed on their way to SCBWI.  It actually feels similar to an incredibly disorganized chat room that I used to frequent on a dial-up modem, designed entirely in ASCII.  I know people love Twitter, and I know I just need time to sort it out, find more people to follow, figure out what an interesting Tweet might actually be, but all the time I'm dedicating to Twit-covery is yet more time I'm not writing.

I'm still new on the blogoscene, all things considered.  I'm still learning my way.  But do you have any advice for a poor girl with a time-management problem who just wants to write AND blog-network AND support her friends' blogs AND encourage new followers AND Twick-or-Tweet AND have a real life?  Is the answer: stop sleeping?  It all comes down to balance, and I've never been good at standing on one foot much less organizing my time.  *sigh*



How do you do it?  How do you manage your life, your writing, and cyberspace?

Pain is Pleasure, Pleasure is Pain

There's a very fine line between pleasure and pain.  I frequently ask myself why on earth I would put myself through some of the things I do (*ehem* grad school *cough*), and I don't always come up with good answers.  For example, when it comes to grad school, I really love learning, and I love the puzzles that need to be worked out, but I HATE the hours upon hours (upon hours...) in the library, the fact that my evenings and weekends are never my own, and that I hardly get to visit my mom even though she only lives a couple of hours away. 

When I first started grad school, that pain WAS pleasure for me.  I think I'm too jaded now.  Lately it's just pain.

On the other hand, there's editing.  Can anyone out there tell me you've never wanted to pull out your hair or stab your pen into your MC's paper eyes (okay, maybe your reactions aren't so violent, but you know what I mean). 

*crickets*
I thought not.

But we all know, on the other side of the editing chasm, there's a beautiful result just waiting for us, and so we plug through.

As I'm working on revisions right now, I keep reminding myself of this—the end result will make it all worthwhile.  But I want it to be more than that.  I want to convert the pain of revisions into pleasure.  I want to learn how to enjoy the process more.  This clearly will not happen by, say, 7:30, but I think I can find the way.  Maybe I just need more practice :)


For you, does revising equal pleasure or pain, or something in between?  How do you keep yourself motivated though the process?  Any advice?

Versatility

First, to all of you in the bloghop, I'm not ignoring you.  I'm coming over as soon as I'm feeling better, I promise.

Yesterday morning I had the pleasant surprise of visiting Helen at Straight from Hel to discover she had bestowed upon me the Versatile Blogger Award.  Thank you, Helen!

This award comes with the following rules:

1. Thank the person who loved me enough to bestow this gift.
2. Share seven things about myself.
3. Bestow this honor onto 15 newly discovered or followed bloggers – in no particular order – who are fantastic in some way.
4. Drop by and let my fifteen friends know I love them.

Seven Things

I had originally planned to share 7 odd or embarrassing things about myself in keeping with the inadvertent theme of this week, but I've been under the weather the past 24 hours with little brain function.  So I've decided to share 7 reading/writing-related matters with you (if you're interested in a more serious list, go here).

1. The first story I remember writing was in the 2nd or 3rd grade.  We had to write a fable about how a rabbit (or a cat; I can't remember) got its whiskers.  Everyone else's story was on the front of one of those huge-lined pieces of notebook paper (the ones with the dotted lines down the center).  Mine was three pages and the teacher had to photocopy page 2 because she hung them on the bulletin board so others could read them.  The other kids made fun of me for spending too much time on it, but I didn't care.
2. My first writing attempt of 50,000+ words came in junior high, and was heavily influenced by my concurrent obsession with Goosebumps, Christopher Pike, and Stephen King—a.k.a. pretty bloody/gory.
3. In high school, I had two stories running at once—one about a lone Chinese girl in her high school (with parents trying to only have boys these days), and the other in which King Arthur-type lore meets high science fiction.  Neither of them went very far, but I'm sure I still have them on a 3.5in floppy at my mom's house.
4. In high school I became slightly obsessed with Russian lit.  I'm not sure how many times I read Anna Karenina, but I knew the story quite well.  Of course, it wasn't until years later when I started studying Russian that I could keep all the nicknames straight :)
5. I started college as a creative writing major at a small liberal arts school.  I was pressured into studying something more "practical", and unfortunately left writing behind for a while.
6. I started writing again a little over a year and a half ago.  It was my way of taking control of some horrible nightmares I was having in the months after my dad died.  I took my dream and wedged into something fan-fiction based because I didn't have the energy at the time to create my own universe.  Unfortunately, it became epic to the point where War and Peace looked like a picture book.  It resides in my computer, completely outlined, over 150,000 words hanging out in numerous word documents.
7. My current WiP-collection was inspired by a dream I had the night before my parents' first wedding anniversary after my dad died.  Maybe it was another coping mechanism?  I don't know.  It's not anymore, and I love my characters, and I love the story.  I have sooooo much work to do on it still, and sometimes it's a struggle, but I love every minute.
8. When I first picked them up my sister-in-law's recommendation, I ended up reading all four Twilight novels twice in 2 weeks.

7+1 to grow on, right?

Passing the Versatile Love
So, now it's my turn to pass this on.  In no particular order...

Cruella Collett at The Giraffability of Digressions
Brigid Kemmerer
The Book Vixen
Lily of Darkness at Lilium's Realm
Jamie at Three Cheers for Literacy!
Chary at Bronx Tales and Inner Musings
Talli Roland
Tiffany Neal
Charity at My Writing Journey
Jemi at Just Jemi
Lynda at .W.I.P. It
Summer at ...and this time concentrate
Hart at Confessions of a Watery Tart
Creepy Query Girl
Tawna at Don't pet me, I'm writing

There are loads of blogs worthy for this, of course, and it's hard to choose.  Definitely check out these blogs!  They're worth your time.

Okay, back to bed with me.  Talk to you later!

Tweetophobia

This week is turning into a list of semi-embarrassing tidbits about yours truly.  How did that happen? (If you missed it, Sunday ended in my admitting to missing a character, and yesterday I discussed my cast and—former!—Gossip Girl obsession.)

So today, here I go admitting another of my problem areas for all the world to see:  I'm afraid of Twitter.  Yes, I admit it.  The first step in seeking help is admitting you have a problem, right?

At least the little birdie is heading east :)

You may be wondering how on earth I could possibly be afraid of a social-networking tool.  I obviously blog, I have a Facebook account**, I have previously had MySpace and Friendster accounts (although I think I have finally gotten those closed), and I have three email addresses.  I am not anti-technology.  I am not anti-social.  Therefore, I should not be anti-social technology.

Here's the rub.  I joined FB back in the days when you needed a .edu email address to get an account—very long ago indeed.  We also all know that academics tend to have strong opinions.  Having been on FB for *cough* years when Twitter rolled around, the FB backlash strongly influenced my understanding on Twitter:  it's a useless long list of unrelated tweets about whatever random things Ashton Kutcher's brain can create, and a bunch of tweetheads who tweet sweet nothings in his ear.  Does that sound positive to you?

But I have recently thrown myself into the blogosphere, full of writers and agents and editors who all suggest you follow them, be it for networking, researching, or simply gaining more points on that contest to receive so-and-so's latest ARC release.  I've been pondering Twitter and it's meaning in my life now for two months and have yet to muster the courage/hutzpa/cajones/jajca to open an account.

Surely I have nothing to fear but the fear itself.  Now I just need to move past it.

I would ask if you have a Twitter account, but that's probably an obvious yes.  How do you use it?  Do you tweet and retweet or just follow?  And, forgive my ignorance here, but how do you follow a tweeted conversation when other tweets show up in between?  Is there a Twitter equivalent to the Blogger dashboard or Google reader?  Anybody got a Twitter for Dummies manual lying around?

**I am not trying to hide on FB from anyone, even though I haven't linked myself up here.  At the moment most of my academic compatriots know nothing about my alternative life as a writer, and I'm not quite ready to have the world merge.  If you're truly motivated, I would never deny a friend request.  But when I get more of my clashing-world scenario smoothed out, I'll add an FB link on the sidebar.

Fantasy Blog Hop

What a great idea!  A blog-hop to meet other bloggers that blog similar topics to yours.  Brilliant, really.  Three cheers for Tessa.

I don't have much of my writing on my blog yet (I'm still pretty new to this), but you can check out this one if you'd like.

1. Add yourself to the list if you think you fit the topic of the week
2. Get the code and post it on your blog. This is essential - if you don't, people won't be able to hop on from there. That's just plain rude and a major annoyance. It will also land you on many people's blacklist of blogs-never-to-visit-again.
3. If you like, do a post on your blog introducing yourself to your visitors. 
4. Each list will be up for a week or so...or at least it will be accessible for that long.

This week's theme: 

The Life Fantastic

Do you write fantasy stories/novels (any subgenre welcome)? 

Do you read/review fantasy books? 

Maybe you create fantasy art? 

Join the list and meet other like-minded creatures of the web!
(this week's linky list features a thumbnail picture of you)

For the Love of Character...

Based on a particular comment on yesterday's post (i.e., I must be crazy if I'm a writer—which is quite observant), I've decided not to hide my weirdness.  There's no need to pretend I'm normal or mature. 

Though I doubt I've hidden it from you until now.

(This is not actually the point to this post.  The digression stops here, folks!  Insert poorly written segue...)

What is a story without strong characters?  There are many answers to this question, but the one that's vital is, it's unpublishable.  This is hardly a new concept.  Characters are bread and butter in this industry.  A great story can be written with little conflict (though I wouldn't recommend it), but a story is nothing without its people.

Tying all of this together now, my crazy brain likes to dream in wild ways that are so far from reality that the Milky Way looks no bigger than it's candy bar counterpart.  In this fantasy anti-reality, my current WiP comes complete with a soundtrack and full cast.  Well, not full, but close.  And by cast I mean actual contemporary actors who would play a certain role well.

Now we understand why I write fantasy—nothing in my head is real :)

This morning on my walk to class I got to thinking about my cast.  I'm a little embarrassed to tell you who's in it, but there are some definite highlights from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Gossip Girl (ten points to whoever can identify the actor in both).  One actor I've never even seen act, but only seen him in commercials for movies and television, or on the cover of something akin to Teen Beat while waiting to pay for my groceries. 

While trying to keep my balance on the worn, slick brick path through the woods on campus, I had a startling, painful, depressing realization.  I have no actor for my MC.  The story's told in first person.  My MC should be the person we know the best.  So why couldn't I pick an actor to play her?

Okay, there are two possible answers to this.  The optimistic one: I don't watch a lot of teeny-bopper TV and movies (Gossip Girl aside) and therefore don't know of a good actor to play this 19 yr old girl.

And the pessimistic one: she's not developed enough.

I just about needed a triple bypass after that thought.

I've been nervous about this ever since I received some preliminary notes that said the reader didn't get a strong sense of who my MC was and that she was a little too perfect.  I mentioned this to another reader, who responded that my MC is a normal teenage girl thrown into an awkward situation, and acts more or less appropriately.  I've been trying to rough up my MC a bit during this round of editing, but I'm questioning everything.  Is it enough?  Is her response here too predictable or not predictable enough?  Should she be good at this task on her first try or not?  Is she being honest enough about this awkward situation, or too honest?

Ack!

Then a fleeting thought raced through my head (crashing desperately just above my ear, preventing its escape), whispering that there are examples of first person narrators in literature who have little to no personality, and who are merely there to enjoy the boozy partying.  I won't name anything specifically because I wouldn't dare want to imply any comparison between me and said author(s), but it exists.  Do I think it's publishable in today's market?  Hell no.  I have no illusions here.

I really wish that thought had flown right out of my ear before I could hear what it said.  Hmph.  It shouldn't have been talking on its cell phone....

Okay, enough rambling from me.  I should get back to destroying my overly perfect, goodie-goodie narrator.


What do you do to further develop your characters?  Do you write diaries or external scenes that should never see the ink of print?  Do you outline or chart different characteristics?  Do you simply listen to the voices in your head? (This may be the only industry where that's not considered unhealthy.)


PS—I want you to know that I'm a member of GGWA (Gossip Girl Watchers Anonymous).  It's been six months since my last viewing.  There's a meeting tonight at 9pm EST/8pm CST.

Self-Indulgent Update

Sunday night.  I've spent all weekend not doing the work I should have done, and I'm okay with it.  My husband and I ditched work together yesterday, and today's been a lovely day of writing, etc.  I'm currently waiting for the multiberry crisp to come out of the oven, and my tea's already steeping.  Oh, and we just brought in some beautiful wild pink lilies that popped up on the side of our house.  *grin*  Aren't they pretty?

I guess that was the self-indulgent part.

As for the update:  Thank you once again for all of your suggestions on my writing crisis last week.  Based on suggestions (and that dreaming-to-waking transition creativity), I settled on two courses of action—the assorted expository hint through the first half-dozen chapters and a brief study session between my MC, her BFF (the abbreviation makes me cringe, but it's true), and two randomly generated people for purposes of exposition.  It currently fits neatly on 4 pages (less than 1000 word).  While it's a little boring in that expository-dialogue-y way, it could be much worse, and it's punctuated by my MC's narrative voice making fun of the situation. Hopefully it's not painful to read.  And nothing's set in stone.  It's not like it's going to print any time soon :)

I can also make one of those extra people useful, of course.  He'll bring lots of extra conflict into my MC's life long after this new guy disappears.  His involvement should also help (hopefully) to resolve one of my crit reader's complaints about my MC's lack of flaws.  It will at least make her more interesting.

On a tangential note, last week while walking to class I was listening to my "soundtrack".  It's not really a soundtrack, since it doesn't actually connect to events in the story.  It's more like a song or two that seem to portray a character's voice.  One song came on, making me feel painfully nostalgic for a character that doesn't appear in WIP-1, but only in 2 and 3.  I've vowed to focus on #1 for now until I'm a bit happier with the flow, etc., but the song made me literally miss my character.  I listened to it over and over and over.  *sigh*  Oh, Zoe.... we'll meet again someday.

Do you ever miss your characters when you take a break from your WIP, or after you finish it?  Or am I just nuts?