****Warning**** This is not a happy post. I will not be offended if you stop here.
Before I write anything else, I want to say that today is my friend Jim's birthday. Jim passed away two years ago from Leukemia just before he turned thirty. If you have a chance, drink a beer for Jim today.
The past few weeks have been particularly difficult for me.
First, my campus job is the managing editor of a linguistics journal. I used to love my job when I first got it, and nothing could have been better than the university (read: my boss/adviser) changing it from an hourly position into a GA position so that I didn't have to teach. Rock! And I'm still indebted to him for making it possible. I just don't love the job anymore.
Which meant that, even though I knew the deadline for the journal to go to print would be this coming Friday, I did nothing with it over the summer. So, September turned into super catch-up month in terms of publication preparation. That was the first reason for my falling into the bloggy black hole.
Second, the beginning of October is a rough time for me. Two years ago, my dad died on the first, and then my birthday is shortly afterward. The year my dad passed away, we actually had to put off the viewing and the funeral so that neither would fall on my birthday. It made for a rather awkward series of events. Since then, I haven't really wanted to celebrate my birthday. It's too clouded by shadowy memories of a false attempt at celebrating that first year, as well as issues with my dad.
I was so wrapped up my work in September that I almost forgot about the anniversary. Of course, that meant that I had two major things due on that date, one of which I had volunteered for. Dumb.
It's been a slow recovery for me this year, especially with Facebook and people wishing me a happy birthday when I just want to forget it. A friend of mine asked why I don't just take my birthday off of there. Honestly, I may have done that last year, but this year I completely forgot. I should just take it off permanently. The problem is that everyone else can separate the good from the bad—or simply don't know—but I can't.
Anyway, it's been slow, and I've been catching up with one thing at a time. First I caught up with the journal, then there's the continuous school-work catch-up, then my critique group, and now I'm getting back to blogging. I'm going to try and be more on top of visiting you all—in cycles, unfortunately—but I think I've dug myself out of wherever I have been for the past few weeks.
Thanks for your patience, folks.